Lost Myself
It seems that I have lost myself, I'm nowhere to be found. Where does one start to look, for someone not wanted around?
Parenting PTSD
To the parents of teens who battle depression: Do you feel like you are experiencing PTSD now? Because I feel that way. Always on edge. Always waiting for the bomb to drop. Always worrying, even when all is okay in the moment. I hear a loud thud from her room, and I go running. I … Continue reading Parenting PTSD
Worry
I wasted a whole weekend in worry, and still have nothing to show. No food, no gifts, no necessities. This grave I'm digging is my own. ©️asewalson
The Heavy Season
We have been going through a rocky time at our house. This started months before the pandemic, but in all honesty, I wonder how long it was all going on before I saw the signs. Our youngest child has depression. For over two years, I feel like I have not allowed myself to rest. I … Continue reading The Heavy Season
Paying it Forward
We were at the Dollar Tree today picking up some candy and other odds and ends. As I passed a man wearing a Chicago Bears stocking hat down an aisle, my purse knocked some items off of a shelf. I bent down to pick them up, and as I did, the man also stopped to … Continue reading Paying it Forward
Dinner’s on Hold
We have a tradition in our house when it is someone's birthday. Whoever has the birthday gets to pick where they want to go to dinner to celebrate. Nobody in the family can complain about the choice, because it's the choice of the person with the birthday. We have done this for years with the … Continue reading Dinner’s on Hold
The Sandwich Season
Have you ever heard of the sandwich season of life? It occurs when you are still in the stage of taking care of your own children, while now having to worry about and possibly take care of your parents. One thing that I seem to continuously forget is that as I age, and my children … Continue reading The Sandwich Season
Joe
Every day since I have broken down and cried. The guilt alone is eating me up inside. Why oh why did you pick that place to hide? It's lonely and quiet without you by my side. If I could go back, I know I'd have tried, to not be the reason you left us and … Continue reading Joe
Big News!
I have the honor of one of my poems, The Clothesline, being published in Ruchi Acharya's Wingless Dreamer chapbook 2019 "Passionate Penholders!" Out of 1,500+ entries worldwide, my poem made the top 50, and earned publication! I am so thankful and honored. I received my print copy in the mail today, and you can order your copy … Continue reading Big News!
Worthy
Vulnerable I listen to regrets of me shattered existence.
Under Water
I had to start a GoFundMe account to help with medical bills that are making other living expenses hard to afford. I am glad my daughter got the care that was needed, but now life seems unmanageable every month. It is embarrassing asking for money. At almost 40 years old I thought I would be … Continue reading Under Water
Don’t Speak
Some things are best not spoken about left alone to grow cobwebs and dust. The moments in time that proved to be too much, too heavy, too raw are better left alone. For heads grow heavy and souls grow weak when burdens are too much to bear. It's of these moments we mustn't speak, … Continue reading Don’t Speak
Acceptance
A beautiful reminder that I needed in this exact moment. Thank you ❤
We need to find stillness
If we are to move forward
We must find acceptance
If anything is
To change
It’s Not Me, It’s You
Let's talk about things, unrelated to your favorite topic the subject of you. My day was quite stressful, but you'll hear none of that because your tone is more focused on you and your time. Nothing is as important not anything of mine. Quick as a flash, no hint of it coming, you turn up … Continue reading It’s Not Me, It’s You
Trees
The trees seem to speak as they wave in the wind. The branches are broken apart yet they stand. Can they feel emotions as you and I? Do they suffer from heartache, and will they break down and cry? Leaves seem to whisper that they know more than they say. Can they too keep secrets … Continue reading Trees
Secrets
We joked in the kitchen, sun shining through the window, about how you had a secret life, filled with people only you know. But a dream brought to light secrets that you tried to delete. I kept scrolling and scrolling, uncovering more heinous deceit. Twenty years were a facade? I can only imagine the depths, … Continue reading Secrets
I’m Tired
It does not take much for him to be distant and cold, very mad at me. All I have to do is speak my mind, have a different opinion for him to unwind. The blow back is fierce when I've half a smile and act upset even just for a while. Empathy is escaping from … Continue reading I’m Tired
It Can’t Rain All The Time
My grandfather died last Friday. I am heartbroken, as he was one of the most influential people in my life. I could go on and on about how loving and strong he was. When I was little, I swore he was actually John Wayne. His name was John after all, and he wore a cowboy … Continue reading It Can’t Rain All The Time
Premonition
Little was gained in recognition while time moved forward in years. Diligent there was a purpose, yet followers stayed back with fears. The eerie cloud of most suspicion lies under the blanket of doubt. He strived for greatness anyway not looking to gain any clout. On that day there was a premonition, where doom greatly … Continue reading Premonition
A Beautiful Disaster 